Relationships and Dating Disasters

Tinder, Plenty of Fish, Bumble, Match, I have tried them all. Bless my heart, right? The whole point of my blog is to be honest and open, and what is more honest and open than exposing my dating life. I am not going to share any names, and if someone I have dated reads this and isn’t happy about it, sorry but you were a part of my life. I realize that this can create a negative opinion of who I am, but I bet that everyone who reads this will relate in one way or another. If you don’t relate, good for you, but the rest of us are still figuring it out.

In the last six years I have casually dated, started relationships, fallen in love and the worst part had my heart broken. If there is one thing that you should never under estimate it’s the power of a break up, however hopefully you learn something as you move on in life. I have no regrets about my dating history, just to make that clear, and I don’t think all men are assholes. We all have met someone of the opposite sex in our lives and can hopefully admit that in some way that person changed us for better, or in some less positive cases for worse. I met a guy right before I turned 21 and even though it has been turbulent at times (this is an understatement), we have found a way to be friends today. Lines get blurred, and as people we are both less than perfect (he wouldn’t admit to be anything less than perfection), but I will always appreciate the honesty and support he has provided over the last six years. I mention him because after things didn’t work out romantically between us, I entered the reality of the dating world today.

Casually dating and meeting men these days is a trip. Apps have been created for you to swipe left or right based on a few pictures and if your lucky a half assed bio that is less than 200 words. No matter what you think, these dating profiles won’t prepare you for the person you meet. I had success using a reputable dating site and it led to a nine-month relationship that I can honestly say was some of the best times I have had in my twenties. The relationship started with two complete strangers spending the perfect day together, I’ll spare the details but it was pretty great. After that day I was hooked, and our relationship took off. We brought our lives together, introduced friends and family, traveled here and there, and before you knew it I fell in love. As time went on and the relationship reached a fork in the road and our feelings for each other changed, well at least his did. The worst part of this relationship ending was losing one of the best friends I had made in a partner. This relationship plus the one mentioned earlier played a major part in my life and taught me a lot about myself, but its time to move on, and what is a dating life with out the casual dating experience? BORING!

So at this point I have had my heart broken a few times, but don’t want to give up on finding “the one”, and at the time I was the token single girl out of my friends. So, what did I do? I activated Tinder, and honestly it should come with a warning label. The warning label should read “ CAUTION: This app may lead to a drunk guy showing up at your house at 2a wanting to cuddle all while repeating how he will never date you over and over” (yes, this really happened). There is a double standard in the dating world today, if a guy is too forward with his intentions he is only after sex, and if a girl is too forward with her intentions she is a stage five clinger. While fun dating apps have lead to lots of fun first dates, they haven’t lead to many second dates, but they always make for great group text conversations with my girlfriends. Sorry guys, but girls share everything and if you didn’t already know this, you’re welcome! Incase I haven’t said it enough to my close friends, thank you for always being there and listening to my crazy dating adventures, and you’re welcome for the entertainment I have provided.

I haven’t given up on finding love, but I have learned that it will happen when it’s meant to and I have no regrets.

-Nicole

 

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